The older I've gotten, I've grown to a point of inner happiness void of the need to have others fulfill me. Let me explain this better. As a teenager, I needed family and friends to validate me. Make me feel special. I didn't know that I was special and uniquely me. Designed to be different. With time, I've learned to stand as myself, loving myself, no matter what others say. It's not that I don't listen to those around me, but I listen to His voice more.
There are times when I go to do something that people look at me strangely. Its fine. I know they don't get it. But, its not about me explaining it to them. Sometimes, people just have to either roll with me or roll out of the way. Please don't take this harshly. But, you can't hear what He says to me, what direction He gives me. So, if you think it strange, ok.
Loving yourself doesn't donate that you have to be selfish. Being self-absorbed is different than being self-loved. Loving yourself means that you value yourself - your opinions, your feelings. You learn to be okay with going out to eat by yourself or going to the movies by yourself or even sitting in the quiet and listening to the birds chirp a sweet melody.
Loving the inside of you helps you to better understand yourself. It helps you get in tune with whom you are on the inside. Personally, I think this is a better way of living. Why? Because knowing me helps me know and appreciate the differences of others. Accepting me as myself and not allowing others to change my voice or viewpoint, helps me to better understand that others have this same right. All of us have the right to love ourselves and be one with that inner person. This for me is completeness. Only when I am complete inside can I freely give unto you what I have. The therapy in writing this blog and in my personal journal helps me sound out the questions in my mind. The journaling are the conversations between Jesus and I only where I can flow and be naked in front of Him. Sometimes the blogs are a result of those conversations. Other times not. That time of day where I don't have to share me with anyone but Him is my sounding board for life. It's the breeze of the early morning, the settling of the evening, the snuggle under the covers for warmth, the serenity of a peaceful mind.
Take time and discover how to love on yourself without being self-absorbed. Then use that self-love as a guide for life. Use it to be gentler to people, loving them harder without the gossip or whispers. I've been told by more than one person that doesn't go to church that they don't go partly because they feel judged when they hit the door. This is not what the tabernacle was built for. Loving myself means I can love you as you are as I want you to do the same for me. Let's not be church folk and understand His meaning for come as you are isn't about the clothes you wear.
Today, I challenge all to fix that thing on the inside of you that needs repair. Until you do this, you can't truly know love. Why? How can you know a thing if you don't possess the thing? Possess self-love so you can give pure love to those around you.
Be A Blessing and Not Just Blessed
- Nakya
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